My Grandfather- Austin Havener

My grandfather Austin died when I was 13 years old- 14 years ago today. He was a lobsterman, avid clammer, and all around great man. It's hard to imagine that anyone you love can have left this world- let alone watch several years go by.
My grandparents Austin and Louise use to watch my sister and I after school growing up- so I was lucky enough to be able to spend lots of time with them--- I would of argued when I was younger that it was too much time, but I'm happy that my parents had us go over there--they were the best example of Great Maine Grandparents.
Not surprising I equate most of my memories of my grandparents with food- Fried Ham Sandwiches in butter after school (they ate dinner at 3:30 pm, and people complain I eat early at 5:30!), homemade buttermilk biscuits with mashed strawberries and sugar, cookies from the cookie jar that my grandmother would sneakily eat even though she had diabetes (she would only take a half at a time), and Easter dinners with boxed confetti cake made into the shape of a bunny.
I loved my grandparents intensely-- it also helped that my grandfather would always hand out dollar bills to all of his grand kids whenever we saw him.
Austin once built me a swing off of his "shop" it was a really high off the ground sort of swing so he would have to watch me as I was up there since I was pretty little at the time--- one day I was swinging and jumped high off the swing because I spotted a face painted on a rock across the street---My grandfather had painted it there for me (and probably for everyone) to see. I'm not sure why but he would change it's expression from time to time--- perhaps dependent on the weather.
There was also longgggggggggg rides to my Aunt's restaurant for lunch (11am?-omg I'm figuring out where my insane eating patterns come from as I write this)---I swear we would be in the car for half a day before we would get to Union eat a very slow lunch and then drive another half a day home listening to very old country music. I learned the concept of a Sunday drive from my grandparents.
There was other things I remember: My grandfather mowing his lawn all the time, board games, Listening to the VHF on who was getting pulled over or in trouble in town (Long John and Pantyhose were my grandparents code names on the VHF).... Get togethers at my grandparents house: Christmas Eve get togethers, Huge Easter Egg Hunts, Summer time BBQ's with wiffleball. I missed all of this so much after my grandparents passed.
The death of my grandfather was a huge event in my life- it was the first person I was very close to that died- and I loved him with all my 13 year old heart could muster. I was devastated by it, and I was just as much when my grandmother died a few years later.
However- I am so incredibly lucky to have had the time I did with them- and I'm also lucky to have family members that remind me so much of them. Like my Aunt Lynnette who is just this incredible person- she reminds me so much of a combination of both of my grandparents-- she is such a tough lady but she has one of the biggest hearts. And of course my Father- who I thank God for everyday that I am blessed to have as a Dad--my grandparents left me with the greatest gift- of having him as a dad.
I truly believe that a person does not die if their memories continue to stay in the hearts and stories of their loved ones. It has been 14 years since my grandfather has passed, but I can still see him clearly in my head riding his tractor in the field across the street. Love and Miss you Gramp.